being isolated!

Once a while, i realized that i am totally being isolated from the world. emerge in the isolated in Shah Alam SECTION 26 zone. Semester 2 is really not easy. u need know a lot of system in our body especially nervous system (difficult topic ever!) and other heavy subjects. a lot of assignment and tests coming very soon. 3 more weeks for study block!!! then 5 more weeks for practical!!! then final exam already!! but i wil squeezed my times for LORD if possible la~

yesterday i called up my parent then i was crying due to 10% homesickness. i was planning to tell them that to take care themselves but the words haven't come out from my mouth. my tears fall down coz i know that less time for me to accompany them.

then ho....i realized that i changed such as: i watching less movie but listening to more music. act mentally more than speak consciously. having abnormal lifestyle. having weird humor. pray more compared to last time. drink more water. ask strange questions. all these are helping me to become a better person i hope!

C'EST LA VIE!!!!ENJOY LIFE TO FULLEST, MAKE MISTAKEN WHEN U ARE STILL AFFORD TO DO SO!!!

Robot holic?

first week back to Study Block after 4 weeks of practical sections.
this week we have so many assignment given by the lecturer, all are need to pass up by NEXT following week. really really work like a ROBOT.

i also notice that i lose weight (a bit la) and looked damn pale. they all said i have to put make up on in order not scared ppl off from moi.

first week had FON assignments, i was so proud of my members they did really well after so many rehearsal with them. wish that we can do very very well next times. even though some of them are nervous but overall they did try hard. to be honest i dont like group work last time, i felt that i also not in part of the group, either i work alone or i totally withdrawn from it. but now....i felt that i need to protect them and look into bigger vision. i will care for them from my heart. i guess this is improvement in the ahead of year 2010.

and...something terrible happened to VIC. OUT OF imagination. i believe that this is only something that tested by Devil. Pray for Vic that she can come back here without going through surgery. so sad to see the THREE GANGster (jess, adeline and vic) missing one. they were like searching for shadow of vic in mysterious way. haha.

Posting week in Columbia Asia

Totally extraordinary posting week in Columbia Asia, it really making me to see the value of simple human life. When u becomes old and there is nothing else u can do other than let ppl fulfill ur basic human needs. Such as lost memory, become weak, eating soft diet food, passing urine and motion, skin integrity become worse..etc etc. they are totally dependent on other to take care of them and everyday they are undergo same process.

First day entering the ward, the smell was ..woh. now I really understand how does it feel if u taking care of 20 above patients’ BO AND PU. And u really need the strength to move some patient since they are in unconscious state. Then ….u can compare the condition between 2 hospitals and the way they are conduct the hospital setting. It is quite interesting.

It really does make me think about what if I have to work in other disaster areas? What if I voluntary want to work in other third world countries? Hygiene and protection of ourselves could be cause big problems. I realize that is not easy for us to give love to others…..only god love. I not talking about share gospel but to show love and put your hand on ppl’s shoulder and touch their face and hair. u need to communicate with those patient who cannot response to u but they can actually listening to u. heart is da key to break the barrier. I believe all of us posted to there did it …it is not about being emotional and build relationship. Something that cannot imagine is in deep inside each one of us. unspeakable.

It also remind me that I need to put extra efforts in order to learn more and more.

sheila, me, shaline and rosby

Mas, mdm alami (mas's fav pt), naida

me and mdm Chai (not in the mood taking pic due to our last day of work)

growing?

Recently, i am quite in dilemma for making decision for certain things. giving everything to God. am i walking in earthly road? indeed i am. am i having desire in certain things other than God? Indeed i am agen!

i am struggling to give up EVERYthing to above all. i am holding on my study instead of going to church. and i am struggling to grow in christ. i really ned to admit tat.

i did take a step forward to him but somehow i am not brave enough to continue. so here i am in my comfort zone.

seeing ppl are changing even though before they are believe in him. seeing ppl are behaving in different way even though they are christian, it really hurt me to see it.

nevertheless, God is great.

so Everything or nothing?